Monday 10th July

I spent about 6 hours yesterday producing transcripts for my English Language coursework. I have an hour of speech to write and it takes me ages to do just a small bit. It is so tedious.

As I hadn't finished it I decided to skip going to my English class this morning and had a lie in.

My dad's going into hospital tomorrow. I don't know what to think about it. I was getting some breakfast and he came into the kitchen and told me that if something bad happened [being sod's law - he's always making jokes about stuff] then he wants me to get on with my life and be happy. I wasn't even prepared for what he said, I wasn't expecting it.

What the fuck am I supposed to say to that. I just cried and told him I didn't want to think about it.
What the fuck will I do without him?
Even if tomorrow goes okay, something's gonna happen sooner rather than later anyway, there's more of a chance for it to happen.

It's fuckin' devistating.