so i always write in here when i feel pretty shitty, but so what, get yo' feelings out and shit.
first and foremost, men are willies. what's the point of being an actual dick.
ste being like numero one in the grand scale. 'i didn't want to hurt you'
oh fuck you.
i hate people who either string you along, use you or fuckin' send you mixed messages and that's exactly what's happened. and the worst of it, i want him back of course. he was right though, he did treat me like shit, smoked weed everyday and was quite selfish. i didn't mind though, how stupid is that? he told me i deserved someone better, well, yeah i do but why the fuck can't he get a grip and be that person man.
he ticked most of my boxes for christ's sakes. not many people can do that because i'm so fuckin' shallow.
the fact he's said all this shit about 'doubts' even after he has this time, the fact he thought things in the first place is still gonna be there. so if he did want me back, what would be the point.
it's all a load of bollocks. his shit excuses. everything.
and why me? it's still, even now, a vicious circle in everything, and just when i thought that some things were going right it gets ruined.
i actually miss him & it's lame.
he said he misses me. he shouldn't have fuckin' done anything then! but then i guess he can get shit off someone else which is what i'm sure he'll find. although, someone who puts up with his laziness, spend-all-money-on-weed-so-no-food habit, the fact he has some fit ex-girlfriend picture on his wall, above his bed, and his small penis. meh.
i asked for my shit back, he almost didn't give me back my a tribe called quest cd and i was like err..
i told him i'd post his dead kennedy's album to him, [although he said he wanted to see me] fuck that, i might even just keep the fuckin' cd.
these feelings of rejection and anger are making me feel sick.
the end.